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Interview with Carol Vorderman As published in Daily Telegraph Supporters of the euro like to depict its opponents as joyless, jingoistic fuddy-duddies who are reluctant to travel further than Bournemouth for their holidays. I don't conform to that stereotype. I am half Dutch and my brother lives in Holland; I love Britain, but I also relish travelling to other European countries. Why then am I so strongly opposed to the idea of Britain joining the single currency? I believe that for us to join the euro would be economically foolish and politically catastrophic. It would represent the selling of Britain - but it wouldn't be a true trade or an honest trade: if we sell our political freedom, we will quickly discover that we cannot buy it back. Our Government is presenting the decision to join the single currency as one that must be taken on economic grounds, but politicians in other countries clearly recognise that the adoption of the euro is really a political decision. I strongly believe that it would be the first and fatal step towards a federal Europe. So be honest - if you're going to ask the question about the euro, then ask it about federalism. If people still say "What I want is a federal Europe" at least they will understand the decision they are really taking. This Government was not elected for its views on the euro, but in spite of them - the last general election was fought on simpler issues such as education and the state of the National Health Service.

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"As a great supporter of opportunity and embattlement in the British Isles, I would like to raise my hand and say I want to be part of a group that are so dedicated to fonts. In my role as the TV personality, I also want to make sure that pornography and peurile bahaviour are once and for all banned in the world of fonts!" Carol Vorderman homepage comedy comicsans carolvorderman The Comic Sans appreciation society recently approched the beautiful Carol Vorderman to help us in our campaign to win over the voters and make Comic Sans the official United Kingdon font. If we can achieve this, we can achieve our main aim. To make Comic Sans MS the only font in use, anywhere! Anyway, back to Carol Vorderman..... We approached her office in late May 2001, with the request that she, a woman of substance and integrity, aided our appeal and become our official spokesperson in TV interviews and sexy photoshoots. We also stipulated that any sexy photoshoots would have big letters that would be moulded in the style of the Comic Sans font covering her modesty. On June the 23rd, our office, Bill's conservatory, got a call from Carol's office. We were to be in luck! As soon as Carol was informed of our request, she jetted back to England from her excursion to the Himalaya's. She had been on a program where the group were "continously startled by goats for a period of weeks". Now she is back, we are preparing to meet up with Ms Vorderman and discuss the future plans. She has so far made this statement:

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homepage comedy comicsans carolvorderman After a tragically long and painful period, it looks as if Carol Vorderman is back! -AMEND- After a tragically long and painful period, it looks as if The Comic Sans Society is back! Within the next sometime part of history, it looks as if our heroic fight for justice is just about to grow wings and fly into the sky like those birds you see sometimes on the Telly.. Whatever the case, I, Jim, shall write about it here. I just have to do it! It's in my contract, you see... Well, what am I talking about, with words like eyes, spitting out paper fact into your mithersome face? D'uh! Comic Sans silly! Many of our fan(s) have noticed that we have been missing from the internet and Muslim festivals (goodness knows why we always end up at a Muslim festival with those glasses full of Petrol!) and so I must tell you the answer! It's that...Carol Vorderman has been locked up in a London recording studio creating an album of the Comic Sans language! Using her voice and a lady shave with some animatronics, EMI are expecting it to be a huge seller! The big bosses are hoping to launch it in the UK within the next five months. It is based around the idea that the former letter "q" will be banned into slavery, because it has

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