Product Description
Set sail for high-seas hijinks and nautical nonsense with those paragons of Pirattitude who invented the famous International Talk Like a Pirate Day. Whether readers are old hands at pirating or hopeless landlubbers, the Pirate Guys will have them pirate-savvy in no time with sure-fire pirate pickup lines for any occasion, tips on how to make their pirate party a buccaneer ball that even Martha Stewart would be proud of, and help determining their true pirate monicker ... Read more

Customer Reviews (18)

A Pirate How too...
"The Pirate Life" is written in bespectacled Pirate speak that pours what they call Pir-attitude "Arrr Matey. What's that your carryin' 'neath yur nickers?" to and fro in order to make whimsical patter and frolic fun. or "Whose that winch you takin' out tonite capn' Blood, me havn't seen her round the aft bunkhouse afore."

Pir-attitude is something necessary to become a pirate, especially on talk like a pirate day... but it's all in fun... I recommend this read to anyone who wants a lackadaisical laugh at a pirates whim...

Pirates ahoy
I could be clever and write this whole review in "pirate-speak" to show the comedic nature of this book, but I'm just not going to. Two guys, "Cap'n Slappy and Ol' Chumbucket", managed to come up with a mini-phenomenon with Talk Like a Pirate Day(TLAPD) [celebrated on September 19] due to the promotional help of Dave Barry. This humor book attempts to take you aside and teach you 'pirattitude' so that you may fully support TLAPD. At no point do these two claim to be experts on the Age of Piracy, quite the opposite, in fact they outright tell you that there was no real fact checking of any kind that took more than two minutes. So largely, this is based upon Hollywood pirates and what can be deemed common knowledge of pirate history. This is really nothing but a bunch of humorous bits crammed together to promote TLAPD but these guys also make no claims that it is really anything else but that. It's light adult humor and if your expecting anything more than it serves you right to be mad about "wasting my money". I knew this was going to be nothing deep and that's what you get, it's a bit like reading a stand-up comic routine rather than watching it.

Overall, it's sophomoric humor but still enjoyable and is here to try and lighten people up to partake in the ludicrous-yet-fun phenom of Talk Like a Pirate Day. If you expect anything more than you shall be deservingly pummeled with fists and forehead.

talk like a pirate!
OK, these guys took a 30 second title and turned it into 14:30 minutes of fame.The first 50 pages are funny, but 226 pages of pirattitude wear thin.

Still it is good fun.I supposed I'm just a little jealous it wasn't my idea.

Good for an hour or so of fun reading
The book is just an elaboration on the "Talk like a Pirate Day" and if you think that is funny, you'll like this book. I got my copy from the library, and really one reading is enough. It's more like a very long Dave Berry article so some parts arrr a bit repetitious if you get my drift. Still though Capt'n Slappy will whack you upside the head to get you to buy this book in an effort to keep from doing real work.

Still if you realize that these guys are having fun, why not join in and talk like a Pirate. Borrow this book to read from the Library and enjoy a cold one next to the fire while you plan out your pirate party. You could waste more time having less fun reading serious stuff.

Mildy funny, mostly tiresome.
This had a few funny bits, but I think I only laughed out loud twice.The second half of the book was painful, it had gotten so predictable.I could have finished it for them.For humor, it relied almost exlusively on turning everything pirate-related into a sexual joke.It got old fast.

Style-wise, they try very, very hard to be Dave Barry - even going so far as to suggest that a funny phrase is a good name for a rock band.I suggest that you skip this effort and go straight to the original, who makes me laugh out loud on nearly every page. ... Read more

Product Description
Dave Barry Is Not Taking This Sitting Down (Susie Breck, Melissa Coates): What's been getting Dave Barry all worked up lately? What can possibly induce him to rise up - yes, actually out of his chair - in indignation? Well, lots of things, including the real skinny on the IRS, Donald Trump, the airlines, and so much more...

Dave Barry Hits Below the Beltway (Laura Grafton, Melissa Coates): Below the Beltway includes Barry's stirring account of how the United States was born, including his version of a properly written Declaration (When in the course of human events it behooves us, the people, not to ask "What can our country do for us, anyway?" but rather whether we have anything to fear except fear itself) and a revised Constitution (Section II: The House of Representatives shall be composed of people who own at least two dark suits and have not been indicted recently).

Tricky Business (Susie Breck, Mike Council): The Extravaganza of the Seas is a five-thousand-ton cash cow, a top-heavy tub whose sole function is to carry gamblers three miles from the Florida coast, take their money, then bring them back so they can find more money. What happens to its passengers and crew in the midst of the fiercest storm in years will change their lives and send them ricocheting off each other like a giant game of pinball. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (3)

Does What It Says
I bought this as a gift for someone who thinks Dave Barry is the funniest man in the world. After reading some of these entries I think I may agree.
I do like a wry smile in the morning.

Damaged calendar
The calendar arrived detached from the base with no way to reattach it. Since it was a gift and not unwrapped until 12/25 I was not aware of it sooner, and by then it didn't seem worth sending it back. I buy the calendar every year and this was the first time this has happened.

Great item
Seller was very quick to ship and I was already well aware of the item I was receiving! ... Read more

Product Description
Chapters: Terry Pratchett, Roald Dahl, Carl Hiaasen, Dave Barry, the Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove, Island of the Sequined Love Nun, Lamb: the Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal, C. D. Payne, Robert Rankin, Excel Saga, a Series of Unfortunate Events, Haré+guu, Di Gi Charat, What It's Like Being Alone, John Swartzwelder, Daniil Kharms, Luna, Pugyuru, Di Gi Charat Nyo!, Youth in Revolt, John Kendrick Bangs, a Dirty Job, Love Creeps, the Stupidest Angel, a House-Boat on the Styx, John Dimes, Bloodsucking Fiends, Fluke, Or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings, Nude Men, Coyote Blue, Practical Demonkeeping, Orange Crush, the Naked Truth, Frisco Pigeon Mambo. Source: Wikipedia. Pages: 219. Not illustrated. Free updates online. Purchase includes a free trial membership in the publisher's book club where you can select from more than a million books without charge. Excerpt:Sir Terence David John Pratchett, OBE (born 28 April 1948), more commonly known as Terry Pratchett, is an English novelist, known for his frequently comical work in the fantasy genre. He is best-known for his popular and long-running Discworld series of comic fantasy novels. Pratchett's first novel, The Carpet People, was published in 1971, and since his first Discworld novel (The Colour of Magic) was published in 1983, he has written two books a year on average. Pratchett was the UK's best-selling author of the 1990s, and as of December 2007 had sold more than 55 million books worldwide, with translations made into 36 languages. He is currently the second most-read writer in the UK, and seventh most-read non-US author in the US. In 2001 he won the Carnegie Medal for his young adult novel The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents. Pratchett was appointed Officer of the Order of the British Empire (OBE) "for services to literature" in 1998. He was in addition knighted in the 2009 New Year Honours. In December 2007, Pratchett publicly announced that...More: http://booksllc.net/?id=30029 ... Read more

Product Description
This is nonfiction commentary. Purchase includes a free trial membership in the publisher's book club where you can select from more than a million books without charge. Chapters: Dave Barry in Cyberspace, Dave Barry's Book of Bad Songs, Claw Your Way to the Top: How to Become the Head of a Major Corporation in Roughly a Week, Boogers Are My Beat, Dave Barry's History of the Millennium, Dave Barry Turns 50, Dave Barry Turns 40. Source: Wikipedia. Free updates online. Not illustrated. Excerpt: Dave Barry in Cyberspace is a best-selling humor book that was published by Ballantine Books in 1996. Written by Dave Barry, this book takes the view point of a computer geek who enjoys using Windows 95. The book covers (in a comical way) such topics as The History of Computing, How Computers Work, Software, and even mundane topics such as internet shorthand. The book starts out with what it calls "A Brief History of Computing from Cave Walls to Windows 95" where it describes how certain aspects of computing (such as emoticons (hieroglyphics)) have existed for thousands of years. As the book progresses, it drifts off to some more sexual topics (in a more humorous than sexual manner). It talks about everything from Quicken to chat rooms and everything in between. It also has some fictitious excerpts from chat room conversations. The book ends with a fictional story from the second-person viewpoint of a married, stay-at-home mom and her gradual acceptance of and proficiency at using the family PC, especially surfing the internet through the AOL online service. Eventually, she meets an English teacher online, and the two develop feelings for one another. The story ends with them deciding they should meet in person, even though this potentially will change their lives forever. There has been speculation that this is a fictionalized retelling of Dave Barry's relationship with his current wife Michelle; the male character's online name in th...More: http://booksllc.net/?id=13055963 ... Read more

Product Description
In this riveting and adventure-packed follow-up to Peter and the Starcatchers, we discover Peter leaving the relative safety of Mollusk Island—along with his trusted companion Tinker Bell—for the cold, damp streets of London. On a difficult journey across the sea, he and Tink discover the dark and deadly, slithering part-man/part-creature Lord Ombra. It seems that the dreaded Ombra has a variety of mysterious powers including the ability to make shadows disappear. When Peter reaches London, he sets out to find the indomitable Molly. Together they must combat Ombra’s terrible forces to both protect the Starcatchers and the treasured starstuff and most importantly to rescue Molly’s mother from the clutches of evil. Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson have done it again—written a compulsively readable, impossible-to-put-down tale that will delight readers of all ages. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (76)

Great adventure for the family!
We started with the Audio Book Peter and the Starcatchers on our way down to Florida.We loved that book so much (9hours, not a bad way to ride withquiet 6, 9, and 11 year olds)that we had to get the sequel for the ride back. Was able to order it from Amazon and shipped to my parents house in time for it to ride back with us to Tennessee. We enjoyed the Shadowthieves as well (again, a quiet ride back with 3 kids, priceless). By the time we pulled in to the driveway we had started the last chapter. We sat in the car for another 15 mins waiting for the book to finish. Great memory building moments for the kids in the car.

The sequel Starcatchers deserved
This is a great book. It uses the same humor as the original, brings back the characters you loved from the original, and introduces some new ones to love (or hate).

Peter and the Shadow Thieves
Molly, Peter, and Lord Ombra seem to have nothing in common when you first meet them. But they all want one thing: the starstuff. The only difference is Molly and Peter want it to be returned to the heavens by the star catchers and the chilling shadow thief, Lord Ombra, wants it for himself, and to give it to The Others. In a ruthless chase throughout London, England, Peter tries to find Molly, the daughter of a starcatcher, before Ombra and his man do. While Peter is searching for Molly, she and her mother learn one of their maids is not as innocent as she seems. Even though guards are in place at the doors that enter Molly's house, they are no match for Ombra. Peter and Lord Ombra each find Molly's house at the same time, and the guards. Ombra takes each guard's shadow andthey become completely under his control. Molly's mother is captured and Peter save Molly just before her shadow is about to be stolen. Taking cover at Georgee's house, a friend of Molly's, they discover where the Return will take place and when. But can they get there fast enough before Ombra and his men do? Peter and the Shadow Thieves is a thrilling book that will put you on the edge of your seat.

Review
Received item in a very timely manner...would certainly recommend this seller to others...keep up the good work!God's blessings and prosperity to you!

The action moves to London
Just as good - maybe better - than the first one! Instead of a ocean and island adventure, this is a Victorian-era London adventure.After dark characters visit Mollusk Island searching for the Starstuff that was lost in the battle in the first book, Peter realizes that Molly and the Starcatchers are in danger.He travels to London to warn her and from there embarks upon an action-filled race to return the Starstuff to space before the Others find it. More action, adventure and fantasy with the addition of a pretty scary villain and some famous London landmarks. ... Read more

Product Description
"Mr. Barry is the funniest man in America and we should encourage him."
THE NEW YORK TIMES BOOK REVIEW
At long last, Dave Barry, the dean of everything, lets you in on the deepest, darkest mysteries of life and answers your hysterical home purchase questions like they've never been answered before.
Amazon.com Review
Time for Q & A with Dave Barry about that age-old question:"What do I need to know before I buy a house?":

Q: What's the best way to determine a realistic price range?"
A: Take your total annual family income, including coinsthat have fallen behind the bureau, and any projected future revenueyou may have been notified about via personalized letters from Mr. EdMcMahon stating that you may have already won 14 milliondollars. Then, multiply by something other than 6.

Q: Is there a secret to having a beautiful lawn?
A: Yes and no. If you fail to feed, fertilize, and water yourlawn, it will die. However, if you feed, fertilize, and water yourlawn, it will die.

Q: How can I avoid spending money on do-it-yourselfhomeowner's projects?
A: Find a contractor. Their silent motto is "We Never Show Up."The Romans lived among ruins. You must too.

Q: What do 1) "charming" and 2) "newly renovated" mean in house ads?
A: That's easy! 1) Rooms the size of nasal spray cartons, and2) that the walls havebeen pretty well scraped clean in the room where the demonic beingsfrom another dimension came through the TV set and caused the previousoccupant's heads to explode.

I've been avoiding buying a house for years, and after reading thisbook, I am convinced I have made the right decision. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (3)

Funniest Dave Barry book ever written
Dave Barry is always funny, but in this book, he is mind-bogglingly hilarious.I couldn't stop laughing, and when I tried to read my favorite parts to friends, I couldn't get the words out for all the hilarity.If you've ever had to go through a move, you will appreciate Barry's insights and observations. This book is classic Dave Barry.I've had my copy for at 20 years, and I still laugh at the jokes.Money well spent for the decades of enjoyment.

Thanks Dave -- finaly a guide to home buying I understand!
Dave hits the nail on the head with this refreshing view of not only how to buy, but maintain, and eventually sell your home.

When I prepared to have a baby join our family, I turned to Dave Barry's "Baby's andother hazzards of sex" to help me make that adjustment.

Thank themaker that Dave was also there for me when we got ready to buy our firsthome!

If you are thinking about buying a home, YOU NEED THIS BOOK!Itexplains that it doesn't really matter who all those people are who show upat the closing...but that it's your responsibility to keep writing out thechecks as long as someone is in line.

There are hillariously practicaltips to searching for, buying, and maintaining your home.Dave presentshints and suggestions that will help you to appear knowledgeable whilelooking at houses, how to get into serious debt, and even about challengesyou will face while redecorating.

He even has the audacity to suggestthat it's possible to redecorate "for under $650,000."Come onDave!Everyone knows that's impossible!

And when you are all done fixingup, being worn down, and you are ready to sell your home, he also presentshints on how to fool someone into buying your "blackhole."

Great stuff through and through!5 stars for humor and reallife applicability!

A must read for first time home buyers
One of the funniest books I've ever read or heard about.I laughed so hard that I couldn't continue reading ! ... Read more

Product Description
Chapters: Muhammad Ali, Dave Barry, Willie Dixon, Christopher Isherwood, Richard Dreyfuss, Lew Ayres, Stanley Kunitz, Lyndon Larouche, Mike Nifong, Jeremy Hinzman, Robin Long, Paul Revere ... Read more